A Nice Cold Jelly
Dang. Did March and April fly by for everybody else too? It was Christmas and just like that, it's practically summer!
Anyways, I have not posted an entry since January. It's mostly because I'm diligently and passionately working on my next book. My goal was to finish it before the baby came (August 8th) but it's looking more and more likely that it won't quite be completely finished. I'm done with the manuscript, a campy cozy starring drag queens, but it will now go through several edits and revisions and it'd be a miracle if I got it out to literary agents by August...But that's what I am still striving for. So, when I do have time to write, it seems silly to write this blog, to be honest, when I could be writing my book. Hope you all understand and can forgive me :-)
I've also been busy with school and the kids (Ella's learning how to drive!) and trying to keep the spark in Adan and I's relationship (if you know what I mean) and trying to take more walks and play basketball with Jakey and keep connections with my friends and reading and keeping up on my TV shows and everything in between. Phew! And we're choosing to add a baby to this mix?! Ugh!
-- We had our 20 week ultrasound a few weeks ago. These photos on this post are from that ultrasound. It was a special event because we got to go to the doctor's office with our surrogate and experience it all "live" and in person. Not only did we get to be with our surrogate, which we hadn't done in more than a year, but we also got to actually witness her sitting back and pulling up her shirt and having the doctor rub the cold jelly on her big belly and use her little sonogram tool thingy to show us our baby right there on the screen in front of us. It was that scene we've seen a million times on movies and TV shows but this time it was OUR baby and OUR experience and it was happening right then and there. It was very powerful and emotional. It really made things much more real for Adan and I. A precious moment, as they say.
As you all know, we've been having some thorny issues with our surrogate, so it was really great for our relationship to actually be in each other's presence for a bit and to experience such a profound moment together. Our relationship is better than it ever was and things are going pretty good lately. This ultrasound also reminded Adan and I the amazing sacrifices our surrogate is making for us. Her entire body, every cell and bone and organ, is going through a lot of shit and it's all for us and our baby. It's hella heroic! And our admiration for her grew exponentially that day.
Of course, nothing's ever perfect on this journey. On the day of this ultrasound, which was in Sheboygan where our surrogate lives, there was a crazy homeless guy that got into the hospital and was acting strange and intimidating. They pretty much had to go into lockdown. And right when our surrogate was giving us a blanket she crocheted, which was supposed to be a sentimental moment of love and peace, became a scary moment of tension and fear because this crazy guy was acting all crazy. I immediately started panicking and thinking about how I could protect our baby from this chilling situation. Luckily, the crazy guy left right when the police arrived and all was well. But I thought it was so ironic and fitting that this happened right when we were trying to patch things up and connect and have an inspirational moment with our surrogate. I suppose this sums up much of parenting...It never turns out as you planned and dreamed :-)
Oh, and enough about me. The baby? It's healthy and everything looks great according to the doctors. It has a big head. And it seems to be a bigger baby in general. Which I was too so that makes sense. We are not learning what the sex is until the birth. I kinda felt there was a mood of boy in the air in the examination room but most people think it's going to be a girl. We shall see :-)
-- The Baby Shower is coming soon! And, from what I hear from my friends who are planning it, it's gonna be an elaborate celebration...Which is exactly what I wanted. We've already got a few gifts from people (our registry is at Target and Amazon). And it's made me realize how small our house is! LoL. I'm getting a little stressed about it. I mean, this baby rocker chair thingamjig, though awesome and probably going to be really helpful, takes up a quarter of our living room! We live in a 1,000 square foot house and have one bathroom. And no mudroom! It's tiny for seven people. I've always liked small houses and it's absolutely never bothered me before, even with the six of us. I'm very much a "minimalist" as far as stuff goes. I like a neat, simple home and I enjoy my life with a Marie Kondo-like vibe. It's one of the reasons why I love to travel. When you travel, you only have yourself and your backpack. That's it. None of the needless material things that don't truly bring joy and speak to the heart. Anywho, I think a baby's gonna bring on a whole new level of stuff and junk and needed space and material things that don't spark joy. Ha! We'll make it work. But I'm worried. Many peeps are telling me to get a new house, and I know the kids would love that too, but we ain't got no fricken money. And my five year plan is to hopefully move to Mexico (preferably Mexico City area but perhaps Oaxaca or wherever) and live there for two years. It seems silly to buy a new home when I'm dreaming of being an expat soon. We technically have to wait until Hazel is out of the house in order to move far away which is actually like eight years from now so my five year plan is pretty much kaput...So yeah. Wha wha.
We hired a painter to do a mural in the nursery. Because Adan built the girls bedrooms downstairs, we were able to have a bedroom just for the baby. It was at first going to be Disney Land themed and it still will be a little bit...But it's more of a Peter Pan and Neverland kind of theme now. So the muralist will be painting a classic image of the Neverland island in, hopefully, a cool vintage Disney style. Once we get that mural on the wall, I'll start decorating and "nesting" some more.
My two cents is that $800 was plenty of money for maternity clothing and she should have considered all options/seasons when purchasing. I was lucky and had a lot handed down to me to save. She doesn’t need to buy new. Maternity clothing can be very expensive as it’s always needed, but there are many options to save money on it and spend wisely.
ReplyDeleteAs a momma of 4, I think $800 was plenty to get clothing to get through a few seasons. The first trimester you don't really need maternity clothes, and while she'll be getting into them after that, $800 is more than I ever spent on maternity clothes during any of my pregnancies. (and I have summer AND winter babies). If you want to throw her a little something out of the kindness of your hearts, for a couple pair of shorts, then go for it. But t-shirts are all season, jeans are usually as well here in WI, and knowing she had an $800 allowance up front, she could have purchased things accordingly. (shopped sales, bought tops that could work in all seasons, etc)
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