You-Terus Be Kidding Me!

Our volleyball team won...One game!

Alright!  It’s been a long time friends!  

Here's a quick update with some very exciting announcements.

I wrote to you guys last time over two months ago.  Many of y’all have come up to me saying “So what’s going on?  I haven’t read your blog recently.”  

And I’m like “I haven’t written a blog recently.”  Bwahaha.  Ding Dang.

Jakey has become a little man in less than a year!

There were some pretty significant things happening behind the scenes but I’ve been busy.  I just published my second novel available for purchase on Amazon HERE.  Thanks to all that have got themselves the book.  You’re all awesome!

The new book!

My surrogate, after completing a Parentage Agreement with her and her lawyers and ours, suddenly brought up the fact that she had a trip to Australia, New Zealand, and Hawaii planned for next summer.  If she went on the trip, she would’ve been possibly 6-8 months pregnant with our lil' nugget.  This led to many deep, thorny conversations between Adan and I and our surrogate.  Luckily, we have The Surrogacy Center to help mediate these types of situations so we didn’t have to directly discuss it with our surrogate.  Our options were to wait a little longer to get the surrogacy process started so that she was only 2-3 months pregnant during the trip.  Or wait until after this trip to get the surrogacy process started.  It was at first tempting for us because it would’ve given us time to save up some more money.  I actually have two fellowship trips planned for next summer too (South Africa and France).  So we wondered…”Perhaps we wait until next summer?”

Our lawyer first of all said “no way in Hell.”  Well, it wasn’t quite in those exact words.  He stated that our Parentage Agreement would need to be re-written and reworked...Which we would’ve had to pay for.  He said if our surrogate ever gave birth or had complications while on the trip, it could cost us thousands and thousands of dollars.  Also, the baby maybe wouldn’t have citizenship if it was born in a different country...And perhaps there’d even be difficulty with bringing the baby back to the States.  He also said that there’s a strong chance the surrogate and the baby could get harmed (or worse!) while on this trip.  Flying is not only dangerous but also the activities they might be doing on the trip are as well.  He said all of this would have to be put in a new Parentage Agreement.

Adan's 33rd Birthday!

My friend Caitlin also assisted in the decision-making.  If you remember, she wrote this beautiful blog post about her IVF experience.  She told Adan and I that we shouldn’t take the chance of waiting any longer.  We’ve experienced first-hand how fragile and delicate this whole process is.  The baby is finally, practically in our hands.  We shouldn’t allow it to slip through our fingers.  Again!  Who knows what could happen?  Maybe COVID gets bad again?  Maybe her transfers aren’t successful?  Maybe we lose a job and cannot afford it anymore?  Whatever.  Life happens.  And the opportunities for sabotage are endless.  

A pic that was taken the first weekend we had the kids!

So, to make a long story short, Adan and I, our lawyers, and even our surrogate’s doctors all told her she had to make a decision...Either be our surrogate or go on this trip.  She chose to continue to be our surrogate.  As a lover of travel and thrilling life experiences, my heart did break a bit for her.  It sucks that she cannot go on such a grand adventure!  But, to be honest, if I would’ve known she had this trip planned, I would’ve chosen a different surrogate.  I am not getting any younger!  I’m almost forty.  Ugh!  I’m going to be one of those old parents.  Yuck!

Also during my blog hiatus...A ton of bills were paid.  About $17,000 worth!

Lawyer's bills...Boo!

Okay.  So now to the exciting news.  Our surrogate (aka Gestational Carrier aka GC) will be going to the Wisconsin Fertility Institute this Friday to begin the process of getting her body (mostly her uterine lining) strong and ready for the transfer.  In fact, this Friday they will also be giving our surrogate instructions on how to give herself injections for the next few weeks to pump up that uterus and make it as strong as The Rock.  “You're Welcome.”  

The Timeline...We're on the "Treatment Plan Visit + Injection Training"

There’s a lot of sticky medical, scientific stuff that will be occuring over the next 2-3 weeks or so for our surrogate...I won’t get into details because I’m a man and it’s all disgusting.  LoL.  However the important date is...Drum roll please...Ratta tat tat tat Ratta…

Our…

Transfer…

Day…

Is…

Monday, November 16th!

Tah-Dah!

On this date, one of our grade “A”, exemplary embryos will be transferred into our surrogate...And hopefully the magic of baby making will begin.  It’s an extremely important date.  I will for sure be giving you all a report on the event.  Keep us, the surrogate, the baby, the doctors, and everyone else in your thoughts and prayers.

Selena lookin' adorbs as ever!

Now of course the transfer could be a failure and they will have to try again...I believe they perform another attempt a few days after that first trial.  If that one fails too, then I think we may have to wait again another month to prepare her for transfer, etc.

But I know our doctors are spectacular and I am confident it’ll all work out.

The next steps for our GC aka Gestational Carrier aka Surrogate

On a side note, they’ll choose the embryo that “grew” the fastest to its grade “A” status.  Adan and I do not want to know the sex of the baby.  Because it’ll be my sperm, I have allowed Adan to choose the name of the baby and also have his last name.  I’m thinking maybe the baby will at least have Neman as its middle name.

Also...With Trump’s new Supreme Court Judge choice sworn in, we could possibly have to pay for our surrogacy completely out of pocket.  We were depending on the Affordable Care Act to help us out, as they do cover surrogacy.  My insurance and my surrogate’s does not.  ObamaCare is up on the chopping block with this new conservative-led Supreme Court.  Ugh.  It’s going to be very, very hard not to be pissed off at my family (who all totally voted for Trump and will be again) if that happens.  Paying for a pregnancy totally on our own without insurance?!  Yeah thanks Trump voters.  Bitches. 

Oops. Did I get political?  My bad. :-)

The kids...Plus a couple cousins...And Kash.

Alright guys.  I think that’s it.  It should be a huge month of some exciting milestones.  I'll keep y'all in the loop.

Joe’s out!

P.S.  Check out my latest blog post on my writing career HERE.

P.S.S.  Purchase Jose Leyenda and the Wailing Woman HERE.

P.S.S.S.  Check out a blog post I wrote for The Surrogacy Center HERE.

P.S.S.S.S.  Oh, and don’t forget about Closeted Life of Claude Hartel which can be purchased HERE.